June Update



(this entire post is from Laura's perspective as Rocky's emotions never yo-yo lol)

We recieved an update on the Thailand program from Holt yesterday letting us know that the June referrals came out early!  Their were 4 children referred to Holt.  Two were matched with families in the program and two placed on the waiting child list.  My emotions were exactly like a roller coaster.  Early referrals:  UP,   4 referrals this quarter:  DOWN,  2 kiddos matched with their permanent families:  UP,  Do we only move up 2 spaces then?: DOWN....Sigh

Yep, up and down all night.  See even though I told myself not to expect anything major to happen,  their is this little what if glimmer that is impossible to put out.  What if Holt receives a record number of referrals and all the families are matched?  What if a child on the referral list matches only our profile and we recieve a match now?  What if...what if...what if...

I couldn't even attempt to wait a second and immediately emailed the program assistant with my questions of how this impacted our family....today I recieved an email from her that we are #14 on the waiting list.  Okay so are you like me and feeling a little puzzled...I mean the math just isn't there.  I was expecting 17 at best, so 14 seemed like a small miracle:)  Again she reminded me that it is impossible to tell when a family is matched as Holt has no idea what type and make up the referral groups will be each quarter, and they can only make estimates.  At any rate emotions back UP.

To put it mildly, I don't really like not being able to have some control over this waiting part.  I want to get in there and just make it happen, which of course I can't.  I feel like God is looking down shaking his head at me, again, with a small smile on his face of course as he knows me even better than I know myself. GOD: "Patience, my child, patience." ME: "BUTTTTT I want it now."

 I can definitely feel the prayers from all of my friends and family, praying #8 on my prayer list...They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run and not grow weary, they shall walk and not faint.   Teach me Lord to Wait.

A rose by any other name...

For our family, friends, and blog readers we have a made a very important decision we thought worthy of announcing.  A few weeks ago someone asked us why we decided on the name Cherish, and more importantly if that is a name we would have considered if we were not adopting.  It really made us stop and think and we had to be honest with ourselves, it really wasn't.  We started discussing the pros and the cons, Cherish means to treasure, and while we love that meaning it is not a name you hear, well barely ever.  Realizing she is going to have many challenges ahead of her, we wondered if by giving her a unique name like Cherish it might add to those challenges.  Yet, we were torn, she has been Cherish in our hearts for 8 months.   The phrase, "A rose by any other name would smell as sweet,"  came to mind (even though in the words of Anne of Green Gables it couldn't possibly smell as sweet if it was called a thistle or a skunk cabbage:), and so we decided to just try out a few different names to see if one stuck.  We have talked of names off and on for two weeks, getting our boys input along the way:  Peyton "how about Mackenzie then I can call her Macky?"  Ian "what about Velma? you know like in Scooby-Doo? that's a really cool name!!"  We added a couple of others and came up with a list of 4 or 5 names we really liked and had partially decided on one, but still weren't sure.  A few nights ago we were on the topic again and decided to google meanings instead of just names.  First we pulled up treasure, which typical of google prompted us to pull up loved, which prompted us to pull up beautiful.  Reading over the long list quickly, we were stopped in the "I" section, Isabel. We both looked at each other and said the name aloud again, more slowly, Isabel.  Rocky said, "That's it"  I said, "I know".  It was exactly that same way when we named our boys, a look and feeling of mutual connection. 

The boys were both a little skeptical still sticking to their above suggestions, but then Ian said, "Mom, I'm calling her Izzy."  Peyton agreed, and they were happy to have found a nickname for their baby sister.  This is really important because if you know anything about the Strand's, well let's just say no one is hardly ever called by their name.  When we named Ian we wondered what in the world they could possibly shorten that to, but it only took about 5 seconds before they simply dropped the "N" and called him "E". Peyton is Peyter baked potater, or simply Peyt.   And who knows what Grandpa Strand will call her!  If you are called anything remotely similar to your name you are lucky!  For example, growing up he called Rocky whatnebager (I'm not even sure how to spell that) lol.  We shall see.

We were worried no other names would sound as sweet, but we have to say we have been using it for several days now and it feels right.  We just can't wait to put a face with the name:)  On a side note we have moved up to #18 because a family on the waiting list above us accepted a referral from the waiting child program moving us all up a space...we should move up again by the end of June and I will keep everyone updated.

Isabel...our beautiful treasure.

We Need Your Prayers

How to Pray for our Adoption

1.        In every aspect pray that God’s will is performed.  To him be all glory and honor.  We are simply his servants and no different than anyone else.  He spoke into our lives and placed a burden for children and young people in our hearts.  He said, “Adopt a child”.  We said, “How? There are so many obstacles.”  He said, “I am greater, I will be a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path, nothing is too great.”  He has been opening doors and providing ever since. 

2.       Pray for our daughter’s birth parents, for peace and strength.  Adoption is a wonderful thing, don’t get me wrong.  But the closer we come to it the more we realize it’s not all butterflies and roses.  Someone had to make a decision and a sacrifice, that as parents we know could not have been easy, but because we do not live in a perfect world they had to choose adoption for their child.  We pray God’s peace upon them, and that someday they will know how much their child is loved by us.

3.       Pray for her foster parents as they fill the gap for us.  Let’s just say this…Foster parents are HEROS.  They step in and care and love for these children as if they are their own, and then we come and they give them up to us.  The foster families we have read about in Thailand are selfless.  We pray God is providing and protecting them, their families, and our girl while we wait to step in as her parents.  If they are not Christians, in a country that is 98% Buddhist this seems very unlikely, we pray we can somehow be the light God has called us to be.

4.       Pray for our family.  Early on we realized there would be a lot of bumps along the way, and once she is home it will change the dynamic of our family.  Pray for our sons that they grow in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and man.  They have embraced this adoption with open arms and accepted without question, and with excitement, that their world is to be invaded by a sister.  Help us to always be what they need us to be.  Pray for our marriage that God would continue to strengthen our bond and help us to continually be open to the purpose God has for us.

5.       Pray for provision.  The largest obstacle has always been the expense.  We knew from the get go we could not do this without God or the support of others.  (Thank you for all the support you have already given as we came before you, almost begging, with requests of financial support.)  God has already blessed us in so many ways, and every time we have needed funds they have been there.  Pray our faith will continue to hold as God helps us move this mountain as he supplies all our needs according to his glory.

6.       Pray for our girl’s heart.  In meeting with others in the adoptive world we have quickly learned that one of the major challenges is the grief that your child goes through upon coming into your life.  Some adjust well.  Some do not.  We are praying now, before we have even seen her face, that God would surround her little heart with the comfort only he can give and help us to know how to comfort her when the time comes.  Please Lord, let the transition be a smooth one.

7.       Pray for our Agency.  We are so blessed that God led us to Holt International.  Adoption is extremely complex and overwhelming, but they have been there every step of the way and are always there for us.  God has been working through them for years and we pray God will bless all the staff who work so hard for these kids all over the world…again real HEROS in our book.  We pray God will give them wisdom to discern the correct placement of the children referred to them.

8.       Finally, for peace right now.  This wait is so hard, there are times when we (especially Momma) feel emotionally exhausted.  Pray that God will give us strength to mount up with wings as eagles, to run and not grow weary, to walk and not faint. 

With Love,

Rocky and Laura

I-800A Approval

For once we didn't have to wait long!  Less than a week ago we had our fingerprints taken for U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services for our I-800A application which deems us suitable to adopt a child.  Today we recieved our official approval letter.  It basically just states we are suitable to adopt a child from Thailand, specifically a female child from 0-3 years of age.  The fingerprints and approval will expire in Aug of 2013.  I can't help but hope we could have her home by then, if not we will have to file an extension.  Once we have accepted our referral we will have to file the I-800 which will list the specifics of our daughter.  But, again, I can't help but be excited that we have one more thing to check off the list.

It will be June tomorrow, another referral month.  We are praying for a LARGE group!  I learned in March, the most recent referral month and our first, that this is a difficult month for all in the process.  It is one of high anticipation, excitement...and questions, frustrations, and doubts.  Please pray for us and all the families who are in the process along side us.

One Step Closer

It seems like a lot has happened it the last few weeks, and we have just been so busy I haven't had a chance to write.  We have spent the last couple weeks spending a lot of time with family, which has been fabulous, some time at the lake, and just enjoying a few days of summer before summer programs start. 

On Friday we went to St Louis for our fingerprinting appointment with the Department of Homeland Security, USCIS.  Our appointment was at 8 a.m. and we were so worried we'd get stuck in rush hour that we left our house at 530 a.m.  Fortunately we did not get stuck but we were there at seven!  They had a cafeteria and after we passed the security check, we were able to snatch a bite to eat while we waited for the office to open.  It took all of five minutes and we were done!  Another step to check off, and we get to, guess what... WAIT ...surprise surprise.... to officially hear from the USCIS regarding our application.

Now for the best piece of news...back tracking just a little, the week before our USCIS appointment, we went camping.  On our little hiatus I took a book my mom had given me, The Circle Maker.  It is very difficult to put into words the impact it has had on me, but I can tell you this I am filled with a renewed sense of purpose.  As I was reading the book I was "circling" things in prayer, and spending some quiet moments with the Master. ( You see even when people tell you that everything is going to be okay, or in relation to the adoption that it will all happen in His timing/that He will provide, until you have that peace for yourself doubt lingers in your heart.)  I found a peace those few days, a peace God has continued to strengthen with each day.  On Tuesday, when we arrived home, I began to go through our pile of mail and my heart leapt a little when I found a letter from ShowHope, a foundation that offers assistance to families going through the adoption process.  They receive lots of applications and are very clear that they can assist a limited number of families.  We mailed our application in March and hadn't heard anything except for confirmation that they had recieved it.  Okay, okay I know you are saying, get to the point already.  They are blessing us with a $4000 grant!!!!!!!!!!!  We are thrilled and so thankful.  I am so humbled.  God already knew that letter was in the mail when I was circling his promise for the provision we needed to bring our daughter home.

After conferring with our agency, the monies will be written to Holt,  we were informed that once we have traveled and taken Cherish into custody they will act on our grant.   Due to this timing, we plan on using those funds to cover travel and post placement expenses.  We are able to see the amounts on our funds needed list decrease, but we will still have to have the country fees, two weeks after we accept our referral.  I know without any doubt that,in the words of ShowHope, God is going to continue to prove himself faithful and provide the finances we need from various sources.  Because he is that big and he can!  After all he owns the cattle on a thousand hills and it will be for his glory as he reveals how much he cares and loves the child a thousand miles away from us. 

Mom's Day

   Mom's Day, as my boy's call it, has been a wonderful day filled with family.  I woke this morning to my husband whispering, "Happy Mother's Day" in my ear.  My heart filled to overflowing at how much I love him, and how blessed I am to have his love and support.  Pitter patters of feet signaled my youngest was awake and came straight into my arms for his morning cuddles, as he sleepily wished me a happy Mom's Day.  My Peyton, hugged me more times than I can count today, and told me over and over, "Love you, Mom".  I wish I could bottle up their hugs to have with me always, truly the best gift of the day was their hugs and kisses. 
   We spent lunch and dinner with our Mom's and sibilings, nephew's/nieces and Dad's, and all the craziness that comes with.  I am reminded again how very much like my own mom I have become, and how much I love her.  She's pretty amazing. 
   My boys are the joy of my world...I don't ever get tired of being their mom, they are mine! and how I love them...

   I have a very full heart tonight, having tucked the boys into bed and settled down for the evening, my thoughts go to my little girl half way around the world.  I read a blog of a friend who met her little girl for the first time today.  She also met the foster mom and family who has loved and cared for her these first few years of her life.  I believe somewhere someone is loving and caring for our Cherish and I am so thankful for that foster mom.  I'm sending our little girl hugs and kisses in my prayers as I pray God's protection over all three of my children and that God will help me to be the Mom they all need.

Coffee Anyone??

Coffee...Just the word makes my mouth water.  One of my first acts every morning, eyes barely open, is to set a pot brewing in hopes that it will somehow help me to jumpstart the day.  My favorites are Starbucks and Gevalia, but we will be trying a new kind around the Strand household.  I registered today for a fundraiser with JustLove Coffee, a coffee company out of Murfreesboro, TN.  Their company developed a fundraising program after the founder and his wife went through the adoption process and felt the frustration, with other families, on the lack of a good fundraising model. For every item, including over twenty different coffees, purchased at our "store" we recieve a good portion of the proceeds.  If you are in need of coffee, or mugs, or scoops, you can visit our store at www.justlovecoffee.com/coffee4cherish We shall see if it ranks up there with Starbucks and Gevalia, though with it helping bring our girl home it might just outrank them!